Happy New Year (still)

2010 will be the year of new adventures. I've experienced the following new-ness so far:

Rock Climbing -
It may have been my first time clinging to a plastic rock and using silly words like "belay", but it won't be the last time. Rock climbing is no longer a mystery sport reserved for uber-athletes and adrenaline junkies (although I guess I've become one of those). This is one of those things that looks difficult but is simple (also deadly, so don't get distracted). The key is to use your legs to push yourself up instead of trying to hoist with your arms.

Contrary to what you might think, as the belayer (the person who stays on the ground and holds the rope) you have absolutely no time to ogle the toned butts of fellow climbers. Disappointing but true.

On the bright side, you do hold your friends' life in your hands, so they'd better be really nice to you.

"Oh, you're ready to come down?! Tell me again how great my hair looks. Say it like you mean it!"



New Car!!!! -
Not really "new" but new to me. Continuing the Honda dynasty of my household, I purchased a 2005 Honda Element as the upgrade to my 1990 Accord. If I loved it any more, I would change my Facebook status to say "Selina Shehan is now in a relationship with Honda Element." All of the seats come out or flip up, it has a tail gate that you can sit on while putting on your snowboard boots or waiting for your tofu pup to come off the grill, it's got a moon roof, outlets for pluggin' stuff in, more cup holders and armrests than you can shake a stick at, and most importantly: dramatic pause...

When you drive this car, you feel like the captain of the starship Enterprise.

I have named him Geordi LaForge.



Training for my first Triathlon -
Both Liz and myself are planning to do the Wunder Woman triathlon in Medical Lake this August. It's still a long way off, but we are both inexperienced with swimming and we want to kick serious butt, so training starts now. Training will include swim caps with giant fake daisies.

I'm including this photo because it makes me laugh so hard I snort. This is a mugger taking down a jogger...no, wait...that's me running a 5k on a cold day. Go 204!


New Band -
The Bleeding Edge was fun while it lasted, but we have moved on to a new project. The new band name is Cryptid, we are a trio with Greg on bass, Tony on guitar, and me on guitar and vocals. I'm hoping to get us out playing shows by early Summer.


On top of all that, I just finished up a few projects that I'd like to share.

The first is the flyer and postcard invitation for Boutiques and Blooms.

Boutiques and Blooms is part of the Inland Empire Garden Club tour, the proceeds from this event will benefit RiteCare Spokane, free speech therapy for children ages 2-7.


The second thing is the updated homepage for Rings & Things
Here's a side-by-side comparison of what the Rings & Things homepage looked like when I started working there, way back on July 6th, 2005, and how it looks as of today (click 'em for a closer look):


an Alice in Wonderland themed ad for Rings & Things

and finally, here is the 2010 postcard invitation for the Rings & Things BeadTour.



And...back to my New Year's resolution of "promoting my business"; I am showing a painting in the SVS (Shrinking Violet Society) Birthday show. Sharing my "fine" art is yet another thing that I've never done. Art for art's sake has always eluded me. Although I've been drawing and painting for many years, I never considered that I could sell anything other than my commercial art abilities. I thought: "why would you pay me to do something that has no function?" It doesn't sell anything, it doesn't inform anyone, it doesn't save the world...but I guess it's pretty. This is my first shot at art that needs to defend itself based on it's arty-ness and not it's effectivey-ness, and that is scary.

Amor y Muerte ~ Selina, January 2010


That's whats shiny and NEW with me. What's new with you?

Serious Business

"2009 is the year we got our grown-up pants. 2010 is the year we get to wear them." -the past year eloquently summed up by Devon

At South Perry Pizza on December 31st, in between bites of delicious pizza and swigs of equally delicious beer, I arrived at my New Year's Resolution. As with most things that come out of my mouth, it popped into my head less than 1/10th of a second before I blurted it out:

"I will aggressively promote my business."

Which immediately led to the question, "um...which business?" ...Good Question. Officially, there's Rings & Things, Spike and Lola, and Selina Shehan Design. But unofficially...there's absolutely everything under the sun that I've ever done or plan to do.

My business is not just a day job, or a haphazard collection of projects, my business is me, and I am serious about my business. Everything about me adds up to the image I project into the world.

Take a minute and think about you - How many social networking sites are you on? Have you ever been in the paper? Ever been on television? Who are your friends, do they all know each other? How do you dress and what does it say about you? If you had something to say, where would you say it?

What would happen if you Googled yourself? Go on, try it.

I took a screenshot of my Google results (see image below) and I pretended that I hadn't heard of this "Selina Shehan" person, whoever she is. Here's what I assume about her based on the search results:

• "Spokane-based Graphic Designer" - she lives in a town with a silly name
• "25th Birthday"- she is in her mid-twenties
• "ETC, for Rings and Things, sets an outstanding example..." - she has a weird acronym in her job title...hmmmmm...I thought she was a graphic designer
• "Spike and Lola Handmade Resin Jewelry" - a different business? There must be two Selinas.
• "Through the Grapevine - Marquette Books LLC" - yet another random thing, she seems like a job-hopper.

That's a quick impression of me from the internet. Not much info, and certainly not anything that I care to click on or learn more about.

Now, here's what you might think if you encountered me in the real world:

• If you saw me on the street, you would probably assume that I'm a good-for-nothing skateboarder who works part time at Taco Bell.
  
• If you saw me at the gym, you might think that I'm a hardcore bodybuilder who has a girlfriend.
  
• If you saw me out with Greg at Twigs in my fancy coat, you could guess that I live on the South Hill, own tiny dogs, and drive a Hummer.
  
• If you've seen me at a concert or a craft fair, you probably think that I'm 16 and extremely emo.

And you might be partially right, but you are mostly wrong. Am I sending the wrong signals?

What I wish you could see all the time is the graphic designer, skateboarder, gym rat, musician, fashion lover, vegetarian crafter that I am every second of the day, and not just when it's outwardly visible.

I want you to know about my jewelry business.

I want you to know about my design work for RiteCare Spokane, a nonprofit speech therapy clinic for children ages 2-7...and I want you to give them money, because they deserve it.

I want you to know that I love where I live and support local business and events whenever I can.

I want you to know about running and skateboarding and snowboarding and everything else that makes my life fun.

I want you to know that I've illustrated books.


This year I'm going to aggressively promote my business.
I want the Google search results for me to read like a transcript from the life of the world's most interesting man. I want people to say, "Oh, I've heard of her," and to know what I do.

What am I doing about it?
So far, I've made a video to promote Rings & Things and Spike and Lola (and myself). I've also put together a press release and gathered some nice photos of my work to send to magazines and newspapers in the area. Then I made a Squidoo lens (it's like wikipedia for projects and businesses), set up a Twitter account, and of course I will continue to blog here.

And that's just to start. This year I am putting on my grown-up pants and applying everything I've learned from years of school, work and life in general to make a name for myself.


I leave you with the following thinkables:

What does the internet say about you? What do you wish it said?

Now...what are you going to do about it?

Hello Holiday '09

Bad poetry about good things:
No presents this year, just lots of cheer.
I'll see my family, we'll have a beer.
When first we see snow, my eyes will tear.
The mountain is calling: come here, come here!

Crappy Christmas Crafting:
Today I made my first potholder out of fabric loops (thanks Amy M for bringing this project). I somehow missed out on this craft as a child. I think I'll give it to my Mom. :-D

~ Merry Christmas! ~


Although I'm officially "skipping Christmas" this year, I realized today that I've actually been missing Christmas entirely since elementary school.

My fondest Christmas memory is from Bellfork Elementary in Jacksonville, NC. For the Christmas of 1989, our kindergarten class made Santa Claus figures from red construction paper with cotten ball beards. They had long, accordian-folded dangly legs because he was meant to sit on the fireplace mantle and stream over.

I don't remember any of my presents, but I remember being very proud of my Santa.

We made them on the last day before Christmas break (it was still called that when I was a kid), and they were still too wet with Elmer's glue to take home on the bus. I wanted my Santa so badly that my Dad drove me to the school after he got off work to pick him up. Miss Brown, my kindergarten teacher was naturally very surprised to see us, but humored me, as a kindergarten teacher should. I breathlessly drug my Dad up and down the hallway of the school, showing off the sloppily colored Christmas trees and paper chain garlands my classmates and I had made. I was so excited to show him how hard we had worked on our decorations.

That's it, I don't remember anything else from that Christmas. What it was really about, from a five-year-old's perspective, was creating special things and sharing them with the people I love.

The feelings we chase but can't seem to catch in the holiday season: Peace, Love, Warmth, Closeness; these things have nothing to do with how many gifts we receive, or how many obligitory holiday drop-in visits we suffer though. We need to stop feeling like the holiday season is just another thing to check off the to-do list. We need to stop worrying that we'll ruin the holiday by not getting Junior an X-Box, or by forgetting the egg nog, or not making it to every holiday party.

Settle down, step back, and take a look at what we've done. We've taken a time meant for reflection, sharing, and appreciation, and made it into a competition where the best gift-buying, card-sending, tinsle-throwing warrior takes the top prize.

The holiday season should be about the people, and the people are not perfect, but that's why we love them.

I'm dreaming of a green Christmas

Deck the halls with bags of money, fa la lala la, la la la...hold on a sec...did I rob a bank in my sleep again?! No, relax, this money is mine, and I saved it the old fashioned way.

Since this summer, I've been tricking myself into saving money by transferring small amounts into my savings account each month. That minimal effort, along with quitting fancy coffee, avoiding Target, eating out less...and oh yeah...skipping Christmas, has made me a mini windfall. We've still got a tree (and plenty of holiday cheer) but no extravagant gifts this year. Honestly, they will not be missed. We're only 8 days away from the holiday of the year and I've done zero running around collecting pricey reminders of my love for you all. I've sent some cards (purchased for 90% off at Spokane Discount last March), bought one $20 gift for a gift exchange, wrapped dog bones from the kitchen for the dogs, and sent Toys R Us gift cards to my little brother and sister (pets and 8-year-olds shouldn't be asked to skip Christmas).

Greg and I went shopping last weekend and bought small things that had been on our needs/wants lists for a while then we wrapped them in last years gift bags and boxes and stuck them under the tree. Of course we already know what's in them, but we do legitimately want what's inside. The part that makes this really fun is that our chihuahua, Spike, gets really upset when he sees people opening presents. He starts to cry softly, then he tries to come over and help open your gift, when he sees it's not for him, he barks and growls at your horrible trickery. And that's when we bring out the wrapped dog bones and watch both dogs go crazy ripping the paper off. I also like to hide treats in the pet stocking because Spike will stick his head inside and run around the house trying to reach them. Christmas joy is cruel sometimes.

So that's that. I am officially a Scrooge and loving every second.


The $30 pre-lit Wal-Mart tree that jumped into my car two years ago


Stockings! Guess which one is mine. Every year I tape cards to the back of the front door as we receive them like we always did when I lived with my Mom. It's a free seasonal decoration, and a reminder each time you leave the house that someone is thinking about you.


Spike checking for presents that we could be hiding from him


Spike and Lola "helping" to open presents


Spikes with his stocking

Don't go there; it's uphill both ways.

Drenched in sweat and struggling to breath, I gripped the table edge and pulled with all my strength. We labored together, traversing vast spaces, porting our bounty, trusting our feet to guide us through the darkness.

This is what happens when your craft show booth is in the far back corner of the lunchroom, up a set of stairs, in an area with no lights, behind a booth that takes up two spaces with 8-foot-tall displays.

Crafting. Is. Intense.

Last week, I launched my resin jewelry website, Spike and Lola. I discovered resin this Summer in the stifling hot garage of a friend and was instantly hooked. Maybe it was the way she offered me popsicles in exchange for spray painting sprinkles...maybe it was the fumes...I try not to dwell. At any rate, I fell hard for epoxy and all the promises it held suspended in it's clear, chemical makeup.

So powerful was my zeal, that I signed up for my very first craft fair and spent the next few months measuring, mixing, pouring, sanding, and clear-coating in preparation for my debut.

...which brings me to the sweatiness.

My first show EVER was at East Valley High School this past weekend (December 5th and 6th). I over prepared and covered every detail, as is my custom. The only problem is that it was almost completely unnecessary. The crowds were small and they weren't buyin' what I was sellin'.

But in fact, they weren't buying what anyone was selling. Many of the vendors didn't bother to come back for day two after disappointing sales on Saturday, and the whole thing packed up early on Sunday. All told, I left with $160. Not bad for a weekend in which I would normally make nothing, but not quite in correlation with my wildest dreams.

I'm down but I'm not out. I love the way my stuff looks and I couldn't have been happier with my craft fair display. I'm sure I will rock another craft fair, but I'll be more careful about the venue so I reach the right people.

It's done. It's over. I have survived.

A view of a few bangle bracelets, necklaces, and magnets.


The booth. Note the lime green table skirt inspired by Jen's booth at the Ferris show.


Tiny Trees! Ity-bity resin trees with candy sprinkles or glow-in-dark glitter inside.


Skull and Crossbones Necklaces glowing under the blacklight


Greg!


Me!

Better, Faster, Stronger

My constant quest for self-improvement has prompted me to get more serious (read: organized) about my workout schedule. I'm already a gym rat, but I don't keep very good track of my workouts to gauge my progress. If it wasn't for Liz's organizational skills, I would be content to run the same distance and lift the same amount every day, vaguely wondering why it wasn't making any difference.

Of course, there's nothing wrong with eating right and working out without working toward a specific goal. I've just reached the point where I'm ready to take the next step, and for me personally, setting a challenging goal is an easy motivator.

But...

Let's go back in time for a minute...waaaaaay back....back to the spring of 1999. This is me: scraggly hair pulled into a thousand tiny braids, baggy wide-legged jeans and a Megadeth t-shirt, sitting on the couch eating an entire box of Wheat Thins dipped in salad bowl filled with melted cheese. It's pouring rain outside and I'm watching The Offspring's "Pretty Fly for a White Guy" video on Total Request Live. This is my typical after-school routine when I don't have golf practice, my wind-down before hitting the books.

Then suddenly, out-of-nowhere, I got bored.

It had never happened before. There was nothing in the world that held my attention better than the television and a giant bowl of finger food. I felt antsy, like I needed to move. I was confused.

So I got up, grabbed an umbrella, and ventured out into the rain with my portable CD player balanced carefully in my pocket (so it wouldn't skip), and I walked for two hours.

I passed the familiar landmarks of Linda's house, the Fern Hill Library and about 50 Korean churches, finally ending up at the Fred Meyer on Pacific Avenue, where I bought a Mr. Pibb and a Cold CD then caught the bus back home. The next night, I did it again; and again the night after that; and again and again.

Then one day I picked up the pace a little, and I started changing up the route, and I started going farther. I was too embarrassed to run in public (no one wants to be the fat girl trying to run), so I moved into the backyard and began running tiny laps around our maple tree and patio set. Until the day my Mom noticed I was wearing a track into the grass, and made me move to the street in front of our house. Eventually, I was running 5 miles at a time, at least 3 times a week. It felt incredible, I was finally doing something, and I was seeing results.

At my largest, I weighed 190 pounds and wore a size 18. That was my freshman and sophomore years of high school. I have talked to people that I attended classes with all four years who honestly don't remember me being there the first two years. By junior year of high school, I had dropped to 135 pounds and wore a size 9. My eating habits were still horrible, but the exercise allowed me to maintain a healthy weight.

My weight was stable until I got my first apartment sophomore year of college, and promptly gained 20 pounds. I tried everything to get back to where I was, but I fell into a trap of telling myself that whenever I exercised, I deserved to go out to dinner or have some ice cream. Like: "I walked all the way to the McDonald's...so now I get a milkshake!" Any gains that I made by walking or riding my bike, I completely wiped out by eating like a six-year-old on the loose at an M&M factory. I took diet pills, tried detox/fasting diets, cut out foods that I loved only to devour an entire box of donuts after a few days. But I lost weight, it dropped and climbed, but I was down to 120 pounds and a size 10 on a good day. I weighed myself every single day, sometimes a few times a day, I obsessed about everything I ate. As a result, I was jittery, malnourished and underweight, but still fat. I just didn't feel the same drive to move and run that used to be so strong.

One day in 2007, after moving into my house, Erin called and asked if I wanted to go to the gym at Eastern with her. I said, "sure," even though I didn't really feel like it. When we got there hopped on an elliptical trainer and suffered through the hardest 20 minutes I'd had in a long time. Afterward I was sore and sad, but determined to try again. We went to the gym at the Phase until her Fast Fitness class ended. Then, on her suggestion, we all joined the Oz Fitness gym in downtown Spokane.

The first thing I did at Oz was try to run on the treadmill, and I made it about a quarter mile before I had to walk. I was so disappointed in myself, I couldn't believe that I had let myself fall so far even though it seemed like I was constantly trying to loose weight. One of their personal trainers gave me a body fat analysis and set some goals for gaining weight (gaining!) and reducing my fat to muscle ratio. He told me to eat real food and get at least 1,500 calories and 40 grams of protein each day. My weight gain goal was set at 135 pounds.

Having it written down, reduced to simple math and displayed in black and white, I couldn't help but be shocked at how simple it seemed. "Three months," he said, "I want to see you hit this goal in three months."

Here I am two years later: 135 pounds, size 5*, long distance runner. Once again sitting on my couch, but drinking a protein shake and getting ready to have a healthy sandwich with a bowl of soup.

*See that?! 15 pounds heavier than my lightest weight, but 5 sizes smaller. All muscle.


Here's what I'm up to these days:

Running Training Schedule - 7 week cycle

Week	Mon	Tue	Wed	Thu	Fri	Sat	Sun	Total
1	3	Rest	5	3	Rest	cross train	8	19
2	3	Rest	5	3	Rest	cross train	10	21
3	4	Rest	5	4	Rest	cross train	11	24
4	4	Rest	6	4	Rest	cross train	12	26
5	4	Rest	5	4	Rest	cross train	9	22
6	3	Rest	4	3	Rest	cross train	8	18
7	3	Rest	3	Walk 2	Rest	cross train	13	21

cross train = elliptical trainer for 30 minutes or some other kind of aerobic activity
Also, even though the weekdays are set low for mileage, I don't stop myself if I feel like running farther. I also don't worry if I end up walking, the point is that I'm doing something.


Current Weight Training Schedule
"A days" and "B days" alternating on Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday
"A days" have been renamed to "Fun weights day" and "B days" are now "Awesome weights day"

Fun weights - 50lb barbell, 3 sets of 8
Overhead Press
Bent-over Rows
Squats

Awesome weights - varying weight, 3 sets of 8
Bench: 25lb weights each side
Squats: 10lb weights each side
Pull-ups: start with zero assistance, do as many as possible, followed by 3 sets of 8 at 70lb assistance
Sit-ups: 65lb resistance

My goal is to maintain the 7-week-cycle running schedule above and run a 1/2 marathon twice a year (one Spring, one Fall). For weights, I want be able to add 5 pounds of resistance every 2 months until I reach my max, then maintain.

Diet Supplements
As a vegetarian, I constantly get asked, "But...how do you get any protein?!" Honestly, the average vegetarian gets plenty of protein from vegetables and meat-substitutes. In case you are worried, I became a vegetarian 17 years ago and have yet to drop dead.

If you are curious about your protein needs, check out the handy chart on this page: http://www.vegsoc.org/info/protein.html

As a runner and weightlifter, I do need to be more aware of my intake. This is true for any athlete, regardless of dietary choices. To get extra protein on top of what I already get from healthy foods, I drink a protein shake each morning that has 14 grams of protein (and only 80 calories!). The brand I use is Aria, it's supposedly "for women" but I'm guessing that's because it's low calorie. Since I began increasing my protein, I've noticed further definition in my muscles and less soreness after my longer runs.

So there you have it. I hope that this information is inspiring and helpful; or at the very least, informative. If you have a fitness goal, I encourage you to go for it, but make a reasonable plan and don't be afraid to ask for help. I was floundering on my own until I got real information from a personal trainer. Reaching your destination is easier with a detailed map.

I am wearing my business pajamas

There is less than a month left until the craft show at East Valley High School! I got down to some serious business today figuring out my product line and beginning work on my website. My dream is to be able to direct people to my site for special orders if I don't have what they want at the show. So far I've picked a name, set up a domain, begun design on a logo in keeping with my products (see below), and enlisted some friends to be jewelry models (thanks guys).

The business name will be Spike and Lola and it will live under the happy umbrella of my current business. I bought www.spikeandlola.com (there's nothing there yet so don't bother to click it).

Here's the logo so far. It still needs a "Spike and Lola" text treatment. I might add more detailing to it also.

(Side note: In between staining the trim in the kitchen, pouring resin, cleaning the bathroom, spray painting signs, and cleaning my brushes with mineral spirits; I suddenly realized that I'll probably be mad as a hatter before the age of 30.)

"Good lord, that's a ton of stuff, it's just a craft show, what could possibly be left to do?!," you cry.

Um...first of all, the bathroom just needed cleaning. But yeah, there's lots of stuff still left to do. Lots and lots. Let me tell you why:

Sometimes I commit to doing something, and I don't go all the way. I just kinda, like...try a little bit...but not so much that I couldn't later say, "It's cool that it didn't work out, I didn't try that hard anyway."

That era is over.

I'm going on the record as saying that I'm working really really hard on this, and I'll be disappointed if I don't sell anything, because I'm actually trying. Training for and running the half marathon has had a profound effect on my goal attainment process. I proved to myself that I could work hard and get real results.

Those of you who know me know that I make most things look effortless, and for the most part, that's because I'm not putting forth any effort. This is not a "look at me, I'm so damn awesome" statement. I only say that to illustrate a point: I am not in the habit of setting goals that I don't know for a fact I can reach. One of my favorite things to say when someone tells me it seems like I'm good at everything is, "Well, I can't dance and I can't play basketball." But...I don't actually know if that's true. I've never really tried to dance or play basketball because, in the back of my mind, I'm hoping that I'm secretly good at those things without ever practicing them. It scares me to death that I might not instantly be an incredible dancer, so I refuse to dance.

I'm gonna fix that.

Next weekend, I will attempt to exercise my dancing demons by getting down and funky at Liz and Jen's birthday, regardless of how silly I look. I will own up to the fact that being really good at Dance Dance Revolution is not the same thing as having rhythm.

And I will make an awesome craft website, and (hopefully) sell lots of awesome crafts that I worked really hard on.

All of this, in my Cheshire Cat pajamas.

-------------------------------------------------------

A few days ago, I started reading the Facebook developer blog to see what new horrifying changes they were going to bring down on us like the Hammer of Awful. Who likes the new "Live Feed/News Feed" options? Really? You are stupid.

In that spirit, I found it hilarious that they mark their potential updates with this snazzy orange button (circled in blue):


Forget the "dislike" button, I would like a "mock" button

Mock this? Why yes, I think I will. *click*

Somebody please start a group for the "mock" button. I will join your cause.

Getting crafty

On a whim and inspired by the incomparable Jen, I recently signed up for my first craft show. Being in a craft fair is something I've thought about for a long time. I am one of those people who likes to go craft fairs to look, but never buys anything because I know I could make those things at home. A part of me always resisted getting a booth because I wasn't confident that I could make lots of awesome things that someone else would want to own. So, since this is the year of confidence, self-discovery and newness, I thought, "What the hell, let's do it!"

The show is going to be at the East Valley High School, December 5th and 6th. I've dreamt up a very elaborate collection of day-glo, plastic, 80's-style jewelry based on what I observed at the Warped Tour this year. I'm going to be selling resin rings, bangle bracelets and necklaces in neon pink, green, orange and yellow.

Here's a picture of a few of my first items. I'm still learning about working with resin, so there's been a bit of trial and error, but so far I've managed not to create any crazy chemical reactions or accidentally encase one of my chihuahuas in glittery epoxy.


Halloween Party prep is in full swing. Liz and Jen have graciously taken over the foodstuffs. It's a good thing because I've been seriously craving those vegan chocolate cupcakes. The idea of two baking masters working together fills my stomach with joy (then I cry a little because joy isn't as tasty as cupcakes). This year the party is going to be primarily indoors since it will probably be negative 1000 degrees outside. I'm setting up the basement as a game area with a balloon dart game, pumpkin toss, and few other ideas I found online. It should be rad, I'll post pictures when I get all the decorations together.

Since I promised myself I would make time to paint (time that I don't have), I chose to paint something that needed to get done anyway. This years' Halloween Costume Party invitation is done with watercolor on canvas board.

And here she is:


A couple other random things:

1. Here's the new logo I did for the Rings & Things Gallery


2. Today discovered that I've inadvertently saved over $550 by being enrolled in BofA's "keep the change" program. Automatic savings is seriously the way to go.

Nothing but the Truth

Over the past month or so, our group of friends has been talking about telling the truth. Not "telling the truth" like avoiding overtly lying, but "truth" like how you really feel about something. Truth like, "Actually, I'm not fine," "I don't feel like going," "When you do that, it bothers me." It may be hurtful in the short term, but overall, it seems better to have it out in the open.

I'm choosing to write about this today because yesterday I got hit by a car on my longboard, and it was absolutely imperative that I tell the truth.

As the driver was apologizing and saying that she just didn't see me, I realized that the "old" me would have jumped in and said, "Oh, it's okay, don't worry about it." But it wasn't okay, and she should be worried, and she should be sorry.

So I did the "real" thing instead of the "right" thing. I admitted to being freaked out and upset, and possibly injured. I told the police officer exactly what happened, even though the lady who hit me was very nice, and I felt badly that she got a ticket. Why should I feel bad? It's time to stop being so damn nice.

Why do we say and do things that aren't in our best interests simply to preserve the feelings of others? If you are hurt you should say so. If you need something, you need speak up. It's a disservice to yourself to sit in silence. And in a way, it's a disservice to others. When you hold everything in and lead everyone to believe that you feel a certain way, then one day you suddenly tip over the edge and explode, you leave a blast-zone of bewildered people who don't understand what went wrong.

The other day I told a client that they were making a "poor choice" by picking one design over another. It felt weird to offer my opinion like that, and in such a blatant way, but I'm glad that I said it. Regardless of the outcome, I'm happy that everyone knows how I feel.

Here are the two postcard designs. I prefer #2 over #1, I feel that it is the more powerful of the two, and is more likely to leave an impression on the viewer.


So be warned. I am done agreeing simply for the sake of saying "Yes."

Lest you think this is only about being catty and evil, consider that it also applies to speaking your mind in general. When Liz and I first started talking about saying what you really think, I experimented with sharing the funny things that I think about instead of censoring myself.

For example, when I saw that the parking lot attendant at the mall had a giant bottle of wine and a sub sandwich at his desk, I said, "You really know how to bring the party." And we all had a good laugh. Good times. Now we all get to be amused instead of just me.

Another example from Liz: Liz asked the girl (Erin) who scans our cards at the gym why there were balloons in the lobby, and Erin said, "It's to show that we appreciate you today," to which Liz replied, "Shouldn't you appreciate us everyday?" And we all had a good laugh. Good times.

In both cases, we have made new aquantance-type-friends. Erin is now very happy to see us each time we go to the gym, and the parking lot attendants are equally enthused to see us. I'm sure they are thinking, "There's those funny girls, I wonder what crazy things they'll say next."

It's not going to hurt the random people you encounter to know what you're thinking. The worst thing that could happen is that they'll think you are a little odd. But honestly, you are a little odd, aren't you? Tell the truth now.

Everyday could be a Holiday-Day

As I'm thinking about preparations for the 4th annual Halloween Party, I am also looking back at past holiday events. Holidays are very important to me. I love traditions and rites-of-passage almost as much as I like shaking-up those traditions.

Making special occasions out of every-day occurrences helps me remember the good times. Moments slip through my mind faster than I can capture them. My mental shutter speed is no match for a camera. That's why I try to take lots of pictures and write about what's going on in my life. It seems that our minds sometimes block out the good memories when the going gets tough, but I have concrete evidence that I do have a good time on a regular basis. :-)
Try it! Take a picture of yourself with a big, cheesy grin and put it up somewhere you'll see it everyday. When something horrible happens and it seems impossible to find the lesson or the humor, fake it. Write down something positive about it, even if you have to lie a little, it can help shift the way you are feeling right now...and it will definitely change the way you remember it later on.

If every single day could be a party, I would be the happiest person in the universe. I love the way people interact and experience something when they know it's time to relax and let go. Also, being a visual person, I love to make invitations and create atmosphere through lights, decorations and music.

Years and years ago, before my Dad shipped out on a 6-month tour, I created a "Holiday-day" event. I set up "stations" around the living room, each one featuring a different holiday, effectively cramming 6-months worth of holidays into an hour. We walked around to each area, sang the related songs and took a picture of ourselves with the holidays' decorations. It helped me to create a memory for each holiday that included our whole family. That way, when the actual holiday rolled around, I wouldn't have to feel like anyone was missing.

It's about escapism. It's very much about forgetting that tomorrow we get on a boat and sail away from the ones we love. Whether that's an actual boat or just the obligations in our lives that pull us away from what's important, it makes no difference, the feeling is the same.

Here some invitations I've designed that remind me of fun times and make me smile:



On a separate note:

This Sunday, I tried inner-tubing for the first time. I haven't been on a small boat in about 20 years and I never imagined that I would be comfortable on the water. But you know what? It was awesome.

The speed and the sunshine and the spray from the water is incredible. It was much more intense than I thought it would be.

My arms are crazy-sore today from holding on to the mesh handles. Keeping your grip isn't easy and hitting the water is like being struck by a train. I don't remember anything after hearing Aaron yell, "OH SHIT!" Then I was coughing and laughing and soaking wet and trying to catch my breath.

"Super-Awesome, Shorty-Summer" isn't quite over yet, but it could end tomorrow and I would be more than satisfied. The yard sale, the yard-sale after party, having my socks rocked off by Modest Mouse, being seriously piggy-ish at Pig Out in the Park, making a whole new look for my kitchen for just over $100, training for the Spokane half-marathon, and myriad other things have made it incredible.

Bring on the Fall!